Coming into Focus

I am incredibly blessed. There simply wouldn't be enough room here to list all that I'm grateful for---yes, the list would certainly include my loving husband and best friend, Al; our two fabulous adult children and their wonderful partners, Mike and Laurelyn, Beth and Jon, and of course, our two darling grandsons, Graham and Dean. And oh, so many friends. And, oh so much time.

I keep pinching myself because I've stopped working and have made the glorious shift to making my own decisions about how I use my time. Glorious. And a bit unsettling at times. Am I "allowed" to feel this happy? Is it O.K. to greet each new morning with a tremendous sense of energy (yes, my sleep's somewhat improved) and to look forward to the sweetest moments of my week? I'm building new friendships with others who love rughooking, knitting, and handspinning. I'm able to provide rides to shut-ins and elderly folks through Island Connections; each new neighbor I meet is like unwrapping a special gift. My absolute FAVORITE part of the week is volunteering at our local resale shop (Serendipity) where an ever-burgeoning supply of new and gently used donated clothing is sorted, steamed, priced, and sold at unbelievably reasonable prices; our profits benefit the Bar Harbor Food Pantry. And even though the sarcoid makes it tough for me to sing, I'm enjoying using our church's handchimes with little ones (ages 3-first grade) and new, older friends (at the nearby adult day program) alike. What fun! Altogether, in one quickly written paragraph, it sounds a bit frenetic, but actually, it's not. My days are long and if I need a nap, I take one. My activities are spread across the week -- and I love my life and its rhythm. Passionately. I am so blessed.

I've got more energy in the kitchen than I can ever remember having at any other time of my life. Learning that I have celiac disease could have resulted in a whole lot of frustration (and pain) but fortunately, my daughter and daughter-in-law have been great encouragers -- and I'm learning to eat locally. Tonight will be my first attempt at fish chowder which I'll serve with some gluten-free cornbread that I made earlier in the week. I had a wonderful visit with the fellow who sells fish out of his truck at the head of Southwest Harbor; no wonder so many friends had recommended that I stop to get my fresh fish from him.

I've dusted off my sewing machine and am gobsmacked by how much fun I'm having making a special Christmas gift for G and D. Looks like the continued Prednisone therapy and the resulting weight gain will require me to do a bit of sewing for myself (unless I can continue to find great bargains at Serendipity--I'm always on the lookout).

It still feels a bit strange to have SO much time to play with -- my GP and I had another heart to heart visit this week and she insisted that I start exercising to try to combat the Prednisone weight gain. Maybe it will help my sleep to improve even more! (And probably stopping buying those 42 oz. bags of peanut M & M's will help, too!) SO, yesterday I bit the bullet and signed up for a whole year's membership (with an extra month thrown in for free) at the nearby community center/gym, Harbor House. I'm SO lucky that there is a huge variety of classes and most of them are early in the morning which happens to be my BEST time of the day, energy-wise. This morning (are you listening, Beth?) I attended my very first indoor cycling/yoga class -- it's a beginner's class and you get 30 minutes of each -- indoor cycling (thank goodness they have gel seats available) and then some Anusara yoga. It felt great and I was back home before 8:45. There are many exercise options: Zumba, introduction to yoga, yogalaties (a combo of yoga and pilates that I doubt I'll be ready to handle for awhile), indoor cycling every day of the week, fitness classes, cardio sculpt, etc. All of this no more than 7 or 8 minutes from our house. W.O.W.

All this said, my stamina is still a bit precarious at times. My body has fallen into a rhythm where I barely make it up the stairs to bed some evenings at about 7:30 or 8, and then I'm up at 4:30 or 5 AM. Fortunately, I can sneak a nap here and there which sometimes gives me a bit lengthier evening. And one day this week, I even took my nap at 11 AM. Al's been able to shift his work schedule a bit so that we can eat on the early side (5 or 5:30---uh-oh! Are we officially entitled to 'early bird specials' now??). Eating on the early side gives us the sense of an evening, albeit short.

Oh, and did I mention how much I'm love, love, LOVING reading again? Stuff that I REALLY want to read --- so many books on so many shelves throughout the house. It's like having a HUGE box of Whitman chocolates in the cupboard all the time (and they'd all be nuts and crunchy ones, none of those nougat or creme ones--ick!). The TV is getting a bit dusty. I've learned that when my brain isn't full of "work stuff," I can actually read more than one book at a time. Well, not like this wild woman --- but I can actually have more than one book going at a time. And I have a new bedtime routine that NO LONGER includes TELEVISION! About a half hour or 45 minutes before I want to shut the light out, I climb into bed with whatever I'm reading and travel to distant places and times. It's just like when I was a young girl but I've traded Laura Ingalls Wilder for Ken Follett. And, unbelievably, our local public library (rated 1 of the top 10 public libraries in Maine!) lends books on KINDLES! I wasn't aware of it until last week when I put my name on the "reserve list" for a hard copy of Follett's newest book. I was told that there were 142 people statewide who were signed up for the book and that I'd get one of the dozen or so copies sooner or later. A new spinning friend (the fiber, not the bikes---hmmm...guess that could get confusing now that I spin AND spin!) happens to work at the library and suggested I sign up for Follett's book on the Kindle. I got a call three days later that "my" Kindle was ready for me to come in and pick up! WHOA! How cool is THAT? So far I love it!

Blessings. Too many to count. I am so very grateful.